Harry's unexpected romance
by Chop Top
Summary: Harry pursues a relationship with someone you would never imagine. Harry Potter/sesame street crossover. disclaimer I do not own harry potter or sesame street and am not affiliated with those that do.


Harry smiled nervously, he was worried this was a bad idea. Answering some guys ad in the personal section for sex no strings attached. Harry had always been bi curious and he decided that since he was now 18 he was old enough to act on it. But damn! That didn't make him any less nervous. He knocked on the door and the door was answered by the guy Harry was looking for. "Your harry?" asked the yellow pointy headed muppet that answered the door. "Yes I am, Harry Potter. Your Bert?" The muppet nodded and said he was. Harry took a good look at Bert, he was pointy headed with a tuft of black hair, had one thick eyebrow going across both his eyes and wore a striped shirt.

Bert regarded Harry with a warm smile and said 'your nervous aren't you? Don't worry if this is your first time i will make it a good experience.' Harry laughed nervously and managed to utter 'yeah, I mean kind of my first time yeah. I don't usually do this.' Well lets get started Bert said taking off his shirt.

Harry Lay on the bed naked as Bert put his mouth over Harry's rock hard penis, Bert was clearly very experienced as he started pleasuring Harry in ways Harry never in ways Harry never imagined. Harry's eyes were spinning and he was moaning and writhing in extacy while Bert performed fellatio on him. When Harry had come Bert immediately said 'Right, Roll over Harry' harry did so and felt Bert's felt, yellow penis enter him Bert was gentle at first, increasing in speed quickly before finally ramming Harry's tender ass at what felt like a hundred miles per hour. Harry goggled, felt his eyes bulge before screaming 'Oh Bert, Oh Bert! Its true! Mupperts do it better!'

After they were finished Bert grabbed a pair of scissors and cut a small hole in his stomach. 'What are you doing?!' Harry cried alarmed Bert smiled and said 'I'm just making a new hole for you to use. Its ok I can sow it back up later. I need you to use a different hole than my regular one because my....life partner, can't know about us. Understand Harry?' Harry looked kind of surprised 'oh you mean your, with someone?' 'Yes, Bert sighed his name is Ernie we've been together for years. I love him but sometimes I also feel like I hate him. He doesn't understand me. He makes no effort to curb his annoying habits. He just expects me to deal with it. Thats why I put an ad in the personals, I just needed to try it with someone else for a while.' Harry nodded and gave a bittersweet half smile. 'I understand' he said 'I have that kinda relationship with this girl I know. But, never mind all that. This is supposed to be fun right?' Bert nodded and lay on his back as Harry inserted his penis into the whole Bert had just made in himself It felt awkward at first but soon the felt gave Harry a sort of friction that made it still pleasurable to him.

At the end of the day after Harry and Bert had finished pleasuring each other and said there good byes. Harry was on the train home, Bert had sowed up the hole in his stomach and Ernie had come home. Ernie sat on their couch loudly chewing cookies and getting crumbs everywhere. Bert eyed him with a look of contempt, how many times had he asked Ernie not to chew like that? How many times had he asked him not to get crumbs all over their couch and in between the cushions. Ernie was watching TV and was oblivious to Bert's glare. For Harry this day had just been a healthy experiment with his sexuality. Sex, no strings attached and then move on, this was also what Bert had intended it to be when he placed an add in the personals for a young human male to have sex with. But Bert had unexpectedly felt so much more. When he had answered his door and saw he man he had talked to on the phone who answered his ad he fell instantly in love. Looking into Harry's eyes those deep pools of blue he knew this was what he wanted, not silly muppet Ernie with his orange skin and goofy personality. But he knew it could never be, a human like Harry would have sex with Bert sure, why not? it was a good lark. But a serious relationship? no chance. So Bert had simply enjoyed their short time together before watching Harry walk out of his life for good. Now he knew that although he could not be with Harry he could not simply return to his regular life either. There was now only 'the third way'.

So Bert went to the kitchen and grabbed the meat cleaver. he snuck up behind Ernie and with a loud cry of attack brought it down into Ernie's neck. Ernie tried to scream but could utter no sound, his neck was half gone! Bert looked into Ernie's pleading, terrified eyes one last time before cutting Ernie's head all the way off and throwing it into the fire place where it burned. Bert could not bear to watch Ernie's head burn knowing that this meant Ernie's life was snuffed out forever. Now that he was done with Ernie there was only one thing left to do, he got into his car and drove out to the interstate where he pushed hard on the pedal, getting the car to its top speed 100, 150, 200 miles per hour! before intentionally steering into a big concrete wall. The car smashed and went up in flames snuffing Bert out with it. He was free of the torments of love, finally.


End file.
